A Fearful Saint

 

A Fearful Saint

I love history. I’m fascinated by stories of the past, and I have spent the last few months reading biographies of those living in the 1700s. One shorter account I read was of William Cowper’s life. Cowper lived in England from 1731 to 1800. His childhood was a difficult one. His mother died when he was six, and his father sent him to a boarding school from ages ten to seventeen. His experience there was not a good one.

Cowper suffered major depressions throughout his life, and around age 32, he moved into an asylum. There he was led to faith through the witness of one of the doctors as well as through Scripture, specifically Romans 3:25 where it says of Christ, “whom God put forward as a propitiation by his blood, to be received by faith. This was to show God's righteousness, because in his divine forbearance he had passed over former sins.” Cowper said of this experience, “Immediately I received the strength to believe it, and the full beams of the Sun of Righteousness shone upon me. I saw the sufficiency of the atonement He had made, my pardon sealed in His blood, and all the fullness and completeness of His justification... Unless the Almighty arm had been under me, I think I should have died with gratitude and joy.”

While we love happy endings, especially after someone’s salvation testimony, this was not the case for Cowper. Even as a believer, Cowper struggled with severe depression and intense melancholy off and on for the rest of his life. At times, he doubted his salvation and was afraid he was too far gone for God’s mercy and grace. Yet Cowper had a close friend and mentor, John Newton, who invested time in speaking truth to this hurting man. He was Cowper’s pastor for about thirteen years before he moved away to pastor elsewhere. Yet even then he wrote Cowper letters for the next twenty years until Cowper’s death, encouraging him in his faith.

William Cowper wrote poetry, and together with Newton published a hymnbook in which Newton wrote over 200 hymns and Cowper 68. You may know Cowper’s hymn, “There is a fountain filled with blood.” It is interesting that the one who at times wondered if he truly was forgiven wrote here the words, “And sinners plunged beneath that flood lose all their guilty stains.”

Perhaps you, like Cowper, struggle with guilt and lies that bombard you. Perhaps you struggle with intense sadness and depression. Keep clinging to Christ. Keep rehearsing truth. Keep surrounding yourself with sound doctrine and your brothers and sisters in Christ. Keep going to church even when you don’t feel like getting out of bed. On the other hand, perhaps you know a Cowper. May you be like Newton, a loving friend who doesn’t give up on the hurting, even when the struggles persist for years, but who keeps on speaking truth and showing love and care.

I love the following poem by Cowper on the sovereignty of God. May you read it and be encouraged by these words written about 250 years ago by an imperfect, struggling man whom God still used mightily to build up the body.

God moves in a mysterious way

His wonders to perform;

He plants his footsteps in the sea,

And rides upon the storm.

 

Deep in unfathomable mines

Of never-failing skill.

He treasures up his bright designs

And works his sovereign will.

 

Ye fearful saints, fresh courage take.

The clouds ye so much dread

Are big with mercy, and shall break

In blessings on your head.

 

Judge not the Lord by feeble sense,

But trust him for his grace;

Behind a frowning providence

He hides a smiling face.

 

His purposes will ripen fast,

Unfolding every hour;

The bud may have a bitter taste,

But sweet will be the flower.

 

Blind unbelief is sure to err,

And scan his work in vain:

God is his own interpreter,

And he will make it plain.

 

(Information on Cowper’s life from The Hidden Smile of God, by John Piper)

 

--Amy O’Rear