WHOSE JOB IS IT?

This might sound a little familiar if you've already read your church newsletter...

It's a little like the nature vs. nurture debate from my College Freshman General Psychology class. Since the beginning of humankind, we have been excusing our bad behavior by blaming someone or something else rather than taking responsibility. Some say, “They were born that way.” Others argue, “They were reared that way.” All agree, “They can't help it!”

So naturally…or nurtureally…we want to debate over whose fault it is when a child walks away from God after growing up in church. The parents want to blame the church, and the church wants to blame the parents. The responsibility of the spiritual development of our children is often left to a toss-up between parents and church. Parents expect the church to teach their children the Bible stories and doctrines, while churches shake their heads at the failure of parents to involve their children in the programs designed to do just that. When children walk away from their faith, the parents tend to blame the programs and practices of the church. The church assumes that the parents did not have good parenting skills and probably didn't place the proper amount of value on spiritual things. This blame game does nothing to fix or prevent problems. However, both home and church could have a positive impact on the spiritual growth of our children, if each would understand and accept their responsibilities.

So whose job is it?

In Deuteronomy 5-6, Moses is repeating the law to the Israelites. In the midst of his appeal, he urges parents not only to rehearse the law for their own benefit, but also to diligently rehearse it to their children. We often recite Deut. 6:7 as a reminder that parents have many opportunities to speak into their children's lives. The word "shan-an" translated "teach them diligently" is the word for sharpening, piercing or whetting. Throughout chapters 5-6 Moses urges the men and women to tell the story of deliverance over and over so that their children would know from where they came, what God had done to lead them, why God gave the law, and what the benefit of following the law would be. It has been proven that parents have the greatest influence on their children – positive or negative. So it makes sense that the parents have a great responsibility to positively impact their children’s spiritual understanding.

However, in Titus 2:1-8 we find Paul urging Titus to instruct the older men and women to teach and train the younger in what is good and right. They are also admonished to live according to these teachings so that they will be respected and proven righteous. It's interesting that these verses were not given to parents. They were instructions that were to be given to the church-the believers. This implies that the training of our children goes beyond the constant rehearsing from parents, but encompasses the whole body of Christ working together to instill Truth into our children's lives. How better to encourage a parent to fulfill the Deuteronomy Challenge than for our older men and women to carry out the Titus Challenge? And may I point out that the challenge goes further than a discussion? Our teaching and training is about much more than what we simply tell our children.

Our children are ready sponges waiting to soak up whatever comes their way. So don't delay! Parents, teach. Church, teach. Parents, live out your faith in front of your children. Church, live out your faith in front of everyone. I have a hunch that if we will passionately pursue the teaching of our children, the Holy Spirit will do His amazing work in their lives, and they will grow to be a generation that Knows God, Loves God and Serves God...naturally.

~Rebecca Phillips

~edited by Pearl Phillips, Rebecca’s mother, because it’s her nature to nurture